Dreaming of Making Money While Traveling The World

Sobriety Bestie Blog/Early Sobriety/Dreaming of Making Money While Traveling The World

It's time to Dream Big courageous bestie!

And I mean WITHOUT limits. All of our big dreams can feel impossible from the start.

When I was in rehab, I could NOT imagine staying sober for one year, let alone that any of my dreams to come true.

It doesn't matter where we are, it only matters where we want to go.

Here's what I mean.

1.  Get clear on your VISION, your Big Dream!
2.  Take action aligned with your vision, not your circumstances

This is how I was able to "make money while traveling the world" my first year sober. That was my Big Dream!

But legit I did NOT think it was possible.

If you want to make money while traveling the world, or even just stay sober one year, whatever your Big Dream is..

Get clear on what TF it is (writing it down helps!!) then taking action in that direction is how we become dream livers.

And we all about Big Dream living up in here, in Sobriety Bestie World.

So listen in on this episode, "Dreaming of Making Money While Traveling The World," then write in detail your big dreams.

Bonus points if you write your dreams AS IF they are currently happening.

Extra bonus points if you then feeeeeeel them as if they are real.

​This trains your brain for what's to come!



Hello, courageous bestie. Today we are talking about big dreams and sobriety. Maybe you're like me and you have a dream of making money while traveling the world. It sounds like cliche or however it sounds, but that's the truth. That's what I, that's what I wanted when I got sober. And I think that it's super, super important to write down what your dreams are and to let yourself dream without limits.

And the only way that our dreams are going to come true is if we first get clear on what they are and then we begin to take action in that direction. So let's take it back a little bit. So when I was in rehab in September, 2009, they had us write down our one year goals at the time. I could not imagine that I would even stay sober for one year, let alone that any of my dreams that I wrote down would even remotely come true.

Okay. So it doesn't matter where you are now. What matters is that you get in touch with the desires of your heart with what it is. If you could create anything, what could and what it look like becoming clear on your direction. It's like setting that GPS, right? We've talked about being in the plane before on that last episode.

So if you are in a plane in San Francisco and you're going Are you putting your GPS on New York, on Florida, on Canada, on Mexico, on Bali? Like where are you going? Where is this plane going? Where's your life going? So figure out where it is that you want to anchor your life to. Where's your direction?

Where are you going? I think it is so important to have purpose and sobriety, especially in early sobriety to have dreams, even if they seem wild or unattainable or beyond your imagination of what's possible. These beyond your wildest dreams, right? Dreams that you just think there's no way that they can be real.

Here's what happened. So I was in rehab and let's just be like real about where I was at in my circumstances. My circumstances were that I drank myself almost to death. I was in rehab because I because I had to be there. It was, I was choosing life. I was not choosing sobriety. I was choosing life. At the end of my drinking, it was very clear.

I had this moment where I looked in the mirror and I knew that I was about to die. It was terrifying. It looked like I was looking into an empty shell. I caught my reflection in the mirror and it was like my spirit. The flame of my spirit was about to flicker out. I looked in the mirror and I didn't recognize myself, but one thing that I knew for sure was staring back at me, like my soul looking at me.

And I knew I was about to die. It was so clear. And I felt like I was literally a breath away from death and it terrified me. And if you drank the way I did, you're going to get what I'm going to say here. If you didn't, you might be horrified, but this is just what happened, right? I'm not here to like. I'm here to just to tell you like what happened and like the truth.

And I was so terrified of seeing this, like that I was about to die in the mirror that I actually didn't quit drinking that day. I quit looking in mirrors because I was so scared. And I can look back at that at now and have some, a lot of thoughts. compassion for myself. It was, I didn't know how to, I didn't know how to be with all my emotional world.

I had so much anxiety. Giving up alcohol was not an option. Alcohol was my best friend. Alcohol was the only thing that was getting me through. I needed the alcohol in order to cope with life. Like I would wake up in full blown anxiety attacks. So I needed the alcohol. So I quit looking in mirrors cause it terrified me.

And it was a week later that I ended up getting sober. Just kept getting worse, especially those last couple of weeks of my drinking. It's a literal hell that I wish upon nobody. And so I did end up going to rehab. And I flew from San Francisco to Los Angeles to go to rehab on September 29th, 2009.

And I got in the car at at LAX and the driver, the rehab driver is asked me if I want to go back in the airport for any reason. And I'm like, no, why? He's you, are you sure you don't want to go back in, in the airport for any reason? I'm like, what are you talking about? I have my suitcase.

Like I'm fine. He's If you want to catch a drink, we're not pulling over on the way to rehab. If you want to go get a drink in the airport, I'll wait for you. Otherwise, we are not pulling over no matter what. Not for the bathroom, not for cigarettes, not for anything. We're going straight to the rehab.

You do not get out of the car. If, before you get into the car, if you want to run and grab a drink, you can. I was just like, I don't know. No, I don't have a problem with alcohol. I don't need to go get a drink in the airport. Let's just get in the car and go to rehab. I was in such denial. So I get in the car, we're driving.

I went to rehab in this, I picked LA too, because I didn't want to go to rehab near me. I didn't want to anyone that I knew to be at rehab or anyone to know that I struggled so much with alcohol. I had such shame around it. I didn't know anybody else who drank like me or had anxiety like me.

I had that point. I'd had really bad anxiety for a long time and I didn't really tell anybody about it. I didn't tell anybody that I was on benzo. I didn't tell anybody that I was seeing a psychiatrist. I just hit it all because I had so much shame. No, this was 2009. So it was still the dark ages, what I consider like the dark ages of mental health.

People didn't talk about anxiety more freely like they do now. Anyways. So we drive up it's an hour drive to the rehab. We get to the rehab and I'm doing the check in with the check in person who ended up, who was my therapist in rehab. And so the therapist is checking me in and she's just like, how much did you have to drink today?

And I'm like, Nothing. I'm here for anxiety. I was so clear, like in, in rehab, I was totally like that girl in rehab. We'd be in in group talking about whenever we'd start, we'd have to say hi, I'm Bob. I'm an alcoholic like that. And so everyone would be like, I'm Bob. I'm an alcoholic.

I am like Luanda. I'm an alcoholic. I'm Frank. I'm an out, whatever. And they get to me and I'd always be like, I'm Kirsten. I'm here for anxiety. Every single time I was cursed in here for anxiety. And so when I'm checking into rehab, she's just like, how much did you have to drink today? And I'm like, zero, I'm here for anxiety.

And to be clear, this was, rehab's expensive. This was an expensive facility. It was very expensive. And it was an alcohol and it was a dual diagnosis, alcohol and drug rehabilitation center. So yes, people went there for anxiety, but the primary reason people went there was for drugs and alcohol.

And that, Obviously, that's why I'm there, but I still couldn't quite see that, or I couldn't quite admit that. And the way that I looked at it at the time, it was like, I felt like I was on the path to alcoholism, and I wanted to take a sharp right hand turn before I actually became an alcoholic. That I was doing preventative measures, and that I wanted to address my anxiety.

That's what, that's how I thought about it. And so I'm sitting there and I'm like, no, I haven't had anything to drink today. I'm not an alcoholic. I have anxiety. And then she just says to me, this is,

and here is my moment of clarity, the surrender and the humbling blow that cracked my ego to finally make me be able to see that despite 17 years of drinking and even longer than that of anxiety, that I actually did have a drinking problem. So she asked me the next question and she said, So so she says, how much did you drink today?

Nothing. And then she says, how did you get that black eye? And I was just like, Ooh, what black guy? And she hands me her mirror. She goes into her purse and she has this compact mirror. It's and it's like a circular like makeup, compact makeup case. So I open up the makeup case, this little circular mirror thing.

And I look in the mirror, I have this little circular mirror and I'm looking in it and I look in and I see in that little mirror and I see That I have a black eye. And in that moment, when I saw my black eye for the first time, I, for first of all, I had just flown from San Francisco to L. A. and I had no idea I had a black eye, right?

So I'm I'm embarrassed, I'm humiliated, I'm shocked, I'm confused so much rushed through my head in that moment. And the one thing that I knew for sure was that If I don't even know what the fuck my face looks like, like, how could I even know what my life looks like? I literally don't know what my face looks like.

Remember, I stopped looking in mirrors. I literally hadn't looked in a mirror in a week. I didn't know I had a black eye. I didn't know. I didn't, there was so much I didn't know. And so what that really cracked open my ego. It cracked open my denial. They say denial stands for don't even know I am lying.

So what I knew for sure when I saw the black eye was in that little mirror, right? I was just like, all right, I don't know what the fuck is going on right now. But I need to listen. I need to listen. So it really opened me up to a lot of humility and that was the humility that I needed in order to start to actually receive the help that I really needed.

And so from then on, I still was the one in rehab who said I'm here for my anxiety. I, I wasn't like I wasn't like understanding alcohol addiction and understanding alcohol use disorder alcoholism, any of that. I didn't really get it yet, but I knew for sure I had anxiety and that I wanted help with it.

And I wanted the anxiety attacks to stop. And so anyway, so I was a hot mess, right? So I'm in rehab. I'm having all these anxiety disorders. After 10 days in rehab, they take me off the benzos. I'm coming off benzos. There's all the drama in rehab, right? If you've ever been to rehab, that we're all trying to get sober.

We're all confused. We all have different opinions about different health. There's different things that are happening. And. And yeah, so I'm literally shaking coming off benzos. I have a black eye and I'm still writing down on a piece of paper that I want to make money while traveling the world, that's my dream.

That's my desire. That was my deepest desire was aside from staying sober and aside from actually, I think I wanted that more than I wanted to stay sober at that time. I wanted the anxiety attacks. I wanted the anxiety to stop the most. That was like, if I could have one wish in rehab, it was to never have anxiety again.

That for sure. That would have always been my wish, right? But that was even beyond my wildest dreams. I didn't know that was possible. But anyway, I did the assignment. We're in group and I write down that my dream is to essentially what I wanted was to make money and travel the world. So my dream was that I wrote down was to be an international consultant.

And this was 2009. This was like, definitely we had the internet then, but this was like before social media is, it was nothing like it is today. And I didn't know any entrepreneurs. I didn't know any international consultants. I just have always loved traveling the world. I've always been interested in, I've had this deep, explore genes in me and I always wanted to see the world.

I still want to see the world. I've always been super into that. I've always I started working in air quotes, right? Like corporate America when I was 19, I would save up all my money and I would go on a trip. So I'd try to fly overseas every year and I just, or twice a year if I could, right?

So I'd do like a Europe backpacking trip or I went to Brazil or wherever. Like I just always wanted to see the world. I was always so interested in getting to know other cultures, seeing other places, seeing how other people lived and thought and Behaved and I don't know, just all of it, eating different foods.

And I always just wanted to travel. I always, I love traveling. And so yeah, international consultant. I was like, if I could travel while working, that would be like the best of both worlds so that I didn't have to take time off to travel that if my lifestyle was more of traveling and adventure, like that just seemed like the ultimate dream.

Meanwhile, I am literally, we are having group where we were all sitting in group therapy and rehab. And I remember they played the song, the singer pink, she had a new song at that time called sober. And so we're all, we have the lyrics printed out. So I'm holding a piece of paper with the lyrics to her song, sober on them.

And I'm, my whole hands are like shaking. I can't even read the paper because I'm shaking so violently. And that was the first day of me coming off of the benzos off of Klonopin. So I'm literally shaking in rehab. Coming off benzos, wearing a black eye that I don't remember getting. And I am dreaming about traveling the world and making money while I'm doing it, being an international consultant.

So my point of all of this story here today for you, it doesn't matter where you are now. Please listen to this. It does not matter where you are right now. It matters where you want to go. The way that I look at this and the way that I've helped people change their life or guided them in the process right as a coach, but also in my students through my courses and stuff.

And the way that I've done it myself is you have to make your goals in alignment with your vision, not your circumstances. We take action in alignment with our vision, with our dream, with our goal, not our circumstances. If I were to say, I have too much anxiety. I'm coming off benzos. I got a black eye. I don't even know what my face looks like.

I don't even, if, and then I make a goal from there, it's going to be very different than if I make a goal from my dream or I take action from my dream. So like the moral of the story here really is take action in alignment with your vision, not your circumstances. Here's what happened. Look, it was not easy.

Early sobriety was not easy. It was very difficult, especially coming off of getting sober is not easy. It's not easy for most of us, especially if you drank like I did or have all the anxiety and stuff, right? It's not an easy thing. It's possible. It's totally possible. As much as I didn't like the recovery slogans when I got sober, like they help, one day at a time is real.

Like, how did I get a year sober? I did it one day at a time. I did it one day at a time. I literally could not imagine not drinking for a year. I had never not drank for a year before in my entire life. But I could go one morning without drinking, one afternoon without drinking, one day without drinking.

Then I could say, maybe I'll drink tomorrow or the next day or whatever. So I started not drinking one day at a time. I started coping with my anxiety or being dominated by my anxiety one day at a time, right? And just try to just keep taking that next step forward, right? But I also started taking action aligned with my vision.

So I changed my LinkedIn at that time so that I put that I no longer worked at the company that I had worked for up until, I think I got laid off from that job about three and a half, four weeks from when I went to rehab. So I got laid off in September and I went to rehab in September, but like the beginning and the end of the month, right?

So maybe three, four weeks apart. And so I had just left that other company. So what did I do when I left rehab? I took some action aligned with my vision. I put on LinkedIn, so I let the people on the internet know we don't just have a dream, right? Faith is great. Faith is great that maybe I can write some dreams down and maybe there's a possibility that maybe they'll come true or I can at least write them down and try this, but we need to take action too.

So I had the faith that I could set my dreams and see what happens, although I didn't believe it, but I had some faith. I did the exercise and then I started taking the action. So when I changed my status on LinkedIn to, I no longer work for that company, I'm basically letting people know that I don't, that I don't have a job.

So that's one of the actions I took. I also reached out to some of the people that I used to work with, whether they were for the company that I worked with or the competitors, other people in the industry that I'm looking for a job. So I took some action. I still didn't believe it was going to happen, but I took some action.

  I have a serious question for you. Is this overkill? You never can be too sure in the woods, right? When you're alone in the woods, you definitely have to double down. You know what? I don't know if this is overkill, but I know what's overkill. What's overkill is struggling with early sobriety anxiety and not feeling confident in your early sobriety years.

That was certainly for me. I did not feel confident at work. And I wanted to be courageous in life. I had been courageous in life. Pretty much to hell and back. And I had so much fear and I was dominated by it. And if this is you, if you are having that overkill feeling in early sobriety, where it is just too much, I got good news for you.

I have a free mini course. It is a free mini course, the secrets to feeling comfy, confident, and courageous in sober skin. Even if you're alone in the woods, just come to SobrietyBestie. com/transcript and get the goods. Yeah, I'll see you in the free mini course.

 You don't have to believe that your wildest dreams are going to come true or that whatever you write down is going to come true. You just start to move in that direction. That's how it is. We just start to move in that direction.

Even if we can't see it yet and slowly we start to see it in becomes real. So then what happened is remember I had my anxiety was so bad. I had a freeway phobia. I was a phobic public speaking. I was afraid to leave the house. I was, I had agoraphobia. Like I was literally afraid to leave the house.

So I had it was very difficult for us to difficult time. There was so much anxiety. I was afraid to fly in the airplanes. You know what I mean? I want to be an international consultant, but I'm afraid to fly in an airplane. I was like, I didn't know how to get home from rehab sober, I didn't really fly sober.

Like I knew how to like, the way I knew how to deal with my anxiety before I got sober was alcohol. So now here I am, I'm going to be flying from LA to San Francisco, my leaving rehab. I was like, Oh, first of all, am I going to be able to fly home without drinking? Am I going to be able to fly from San for LA rehab sober?

Back home, San Francisco without drinking on the airplane. How am I going to do that? So what happened on that flight? I'm sitting there, just left rehab, freaked out. I wanted to stay in rehab longer at that point. Like I didn't want to go to rehab, but then when I got there, I didn't want to leave because it was like a little safe haven.

But rehab was so expensive. I couldn't afford to stay. I had to go. So I got kicked up, back out into the world. I'm on the plane and the person next to me is drinking and I'm watching them drink a whiskey. And I was just like, Oh my God. I'm just like, freaking out. And I just breathed and I just didn't drink.

And at the beginning, what helped me stay sober was the fact that rehab was so expensive. I could not be the person who drank the day I left rehab. Not after all that money, like that was a lot of money I had to, the pain of spending that money on my transformation. Kept me in the transformation.

And that's why I think in general, investing in our growth, investing in our freedom, investing in who we are becoming is important because sometimes it is the money that we pay, the skin we have in the game, the time a month out of your life to go to rehab or any sort of transformational program that you joined to change your life.

Anytime that we invest in something like it, it's painful. When we have that skin in the game to not continue and to follow through. If you hire a coach or take a course, , if you're in the process of transformation when you're really invested, it can help keep you in that transformation.

So for sure. Part of the reason why I stayed sober in the beginning is because I spent all that money on rehab. Now, I don't think that you have to spend money on rehab to get and stay sober. I don't think you have to spend a lot of money on transformation in order to transform, but it is. A way that helps, when I've invested a lot in a mentor, it has helped me actually show up and be courageous to take the action that the mentor recommended.

So investing in ourself does help us get the result. So what happened? So I'm in early sobriety. I'm anxious. I am coming off benzos. I tried to quit smoking cigarettes. It was too soon. I couldn't, I could not cope. So I kept smoking and I just felt like my brain wasn't working. I, the way that I honestly felt.

And I didn't understand neurodivergence at the time. So I didn't think that there was any possibility that I could have ADHD or be an ADHD er, but I felt like I jokingly said to myself that first year sobriety, Oh my God, it's I have ADHD. I would ask my roommate was so annoyed with me. We'd be watching a movie.

I'd be on my phone, on my laptop over here doing this, doing a dish, coming back, like all over the place. And then I'd be like, who's this character? And she'd look at me so annoyed. She's it's The main character of the movie, but I couldn't focus. I couldn't pay attention. My mind was all over the place, racing mind, constantly anxious.

So my mind was just, it was like a little puppy. It was just wild running everywhere. Making a, wreaking havoc, it was really difficult. So I decided it was a good time to use my body because I felt and I think this is the key. It's so important that we choose a perspective that's empowering.

What's wrong is always available. So is what's right. So if we are choosing an, a disempowering frame that we see the world, we're going to feel disempowered. It's going to lead to negative thoughts, negative feelings. It's going to lead on this negative thought thought, feeling spiral, right? So

we need to choose an empowering thought. And when we choose an empowering thought, we're going to be taking different actions. We're going to be having different thoughts that follow it, and we're going to be having different feelings. So choosing what's right is always available. Choosing an empowering thought is always available.

If the thought that comes up naturally in our head is negative. We can choose a more empowering thought. So I felt okay, my brain feels like it's broken. It is not working. The black eye is now healed, but my anxiety is so bad.

I can't focus on anything. There's no way I could work right now. I'm completely unemployable. My brain is not functioning right. I can't even focus. I have no idea who the main character in the movie is because I can't even pay attention. How am I going to learn anything? Like I just, I was really concerned about that, but I thought, you know what?

I have a little bit of money. a little bit of money set aside. Maybe this isn't a time for me to get that new job just yet, even though I want to be the international consultant, maybe it's a time for me to use my body. And so I signed up for a yoga teacher training and at 90 days sober, I went and did an 30 day, like a ashtanga yoga teacher training.

I didn't know what ashtanga was. I literally just Googled yoga training near me starting soon, something like that. And so I went, it was in we stayed in a, Bed and breakfast in Glen Ellyn. It was in wine country of all places. So I was in San Francisco living in San Francisco at the time. And the training was in Sonoma or Napa.

It was up there. And so we all stayed in Glen Ellyn at this little bed and breakfast and did the Ashtanga yoga teacher training. And so I just focused on my body. And while I was finishing up that yoga teacher training, and let me tell you, that was a good idea. First of all, let me just jump in here and say this.

That was a really good idea. The reason why doing a yoga teacher training when my brain wasn't working was a good idea is because that was my next aligned step. That's what my intuition said was the right thing to do. That's why it was a good idea because our intuition is on our team. There is a wisdom flowing through this that is guiding us.

If we allow ourself to be guided by that into, by that inspiration, that intuition, that feeling that we know that voice that we hear in our head, not the fear we can discern and understand, which is our, actually our intuition and take that action. Take the action based on our intuition, right? We get the inspiration and we take that action.

My inspiration was to do the yoga teacher training. And the reason why it was a good idea is because it was my inspired action. And now the benefits of doing that, right? The benefit of taking that inspired action is that yoga was a great thing to do to help my brain heal. What I know now is that we have this thing called the vagus nerve, right?

It's our one of our cranial nerves and we have not like 90 percent of the nerve fires Fibers, I believe are afferant. They go from our body up to our brain. So by doing the yoga, I'm changing my brain I'm calming myself down. I'm learning how to breathe in a new way. I'm becoming more physically fit if you've ever done ashtanga It's quite demanding you become quite fit it's the most demanding yoga I've ever done physically as far as muscles and stuff, yin was hard at first too, but in a different way. So yeah, the, there's a lot of blood flowing through into your body and your brain. Doing a 30 day yoga program where you're constantly doing yoga, basically, or meditating was exactly what I needed when my brain wasn't working, that helped get my brain working.

And at the end of that yoga teacher training, I got a message on LinkedIn. Remember, I told LinkedIn, I told the people on LinkedIn, I was looking for a job. So I got a message on LinkedIn from this competitor of a company that, the company I used to work for three years before I went to rehab, a competitor of that company reached out and said, Hey, would you like to be a consultant?

We would fly you here, give you an apartment for a month if you could come consult on our business. And doing what I did for the other company it was not international, it was New York city, but I like New York city. I'll take it. It was like on the way to my dream, right? It was close. I was like, wait, this is, I get to be traveling as a consultant to be clear. I had never been a consultant before my life. I had never been flown anywhere as a consultant.

I had never traveled for I traveled for work on work trips, like going to conferences, but this was a whole new thing. This was, it's literally what I wrote down in rehab, it wasn't quite international, but it was good enough. I would have been very happy with being a consultant in New York.

That was really exciting. It was also my first like white Christmas and we'd be at the office and it'd be like snowing outside. And I'm so mesmerized by the snow as a California kid that I'm watching the snow and everybody else is as if I was watching the rain or something totally typical.

So it was super fun. It was also hard up there, right? Because I was still in early sobriety. I was four months sober. So this is right after I did the Ashtanga training. I went to New York and then after New York, I went to India and I did more Ashtanga with some of the people. I did the yoga teacher training with, I'd already applied to go to the Shala in Mysore.

And then I got, when I was in New York, I got accepted to the shawla. So I bought a ticket to India. And then when I was in India working more on my body, which was my inspired action, it's not that what I did is right. It's that what I did is right for me, because I was feeling the inspired action and I was taking the inspired action, right?

I felt like I was out of options. And the only option I had left at this point, cause my brain's not working. I'm anxious as fuck. I can't focus. I can't function. The only thing I have is listening to my intuition. I really just felt like I got to surrender to my intuition. I got to believe that there's a wisdom.

Flowing through me. And if I take that action, it's going to bring me someplace. And I want to find out where that takes me, right? Like my thoughts weren't working. I don't know best. I thought I was knowing best for me. And the next thing I know, I get handed a mirror and I have a black eye, right? So I don't know best.

I've been completely humbled and I was willing to surrender to the wisdom inside me and my, the desires of my heart. And so when I was in, When I was in India, I was, I told you I was studying ashtanga every morning and then I was doing the meditation and learning how to change my relationship with my thoughts, doing transcendental meditation and breathing and getting certified and all these meditation techniques and stuff like that.

And so it was really helping me with my anxiety, but I didn't know my next move. I never knew my next move. I didn't have a next move. I had a brain that wasn't quite working very well, The way that it all worked out, it was so divinely perfect, right? I think when we learn how to be in that space of faith, and taking that inspired action and trying to bring like that, the the principle of bringing our mind into the moment.

Like where are your feet? Where are your feet? My recovery friends will always say like, where are your feet? Bringing your mind to where you're free that your feet are in the day, your feet are in the moment. So when my mind was racing, to the future and trying to manage and cope with the future, that's anxiety or going to the past and trying to manage the past that's depression or resentment.

So when I just brought my mind into the moment to where my feet are, where are your feet? Where are your feet? Where are your feet? And so if I just looked down, I literally would look down all the time at my feet. Like I needed to make it really practical. There's my feet. I like to have my, my, my mind anchor in the moment.

So while I was in India, trying to be where my feet are, but still so anxious. Like I, I don't want it to sound like it was easy and just so much fun. It was it was the adventure of a lifetime, but I was also so uncomfortable in my skin. I constantly felt uncomfortable in my skin and I just wanted to.

Figure out a way to feel comfortable my skin. So I'm literally flying around the world, seeking out teachers so I can feel comfortable in my skin. I just knew there was a way out. I was going to figure it out. I had to, because I couldn't live the way I was living. I was so anxious all the time. There had to be a way for me to stay sober and to not be so like miserable and uncomfortable in my skin.

There had to be a way out of the anxiety or otherwise I couldn't do it. So I was on a, quite a literal mission to figure out how to feel comfortable in my skin. It was a top priority. So when I was in India, I got another LinkedIn message from another company asking if I wanted to be flown out, have my apartment paid for same kind of a deal, contract be there for five weeks and to be flown.

And this one was international. This was in Sydney, Australia. So I get the email. I'm like, Oh my God, like this is, it was like I'm in India right now. And they're like when are you out of India? So I basically, after I was in India, I flew back to San Francisco. I was there about a week and then they flew me to Australia.

And I was there at seven months sober. So in rehab, I'm shaking, holding the lyrics to pink song and I'm shaking and twitching. And I literally can't even sit still. My mind's racing. I have a black eye and I still had the audacity while I was guided, right? I was told to write down your dream. So I listened to the instructions, right?

Because I had the humility because I had that black guy I didn't know about. So I, they said, write down your dream. I did. And now here it is. I'm getting a, I'm getting a ticket to Australia and a contract to go out there for five weeks and be in. Literally an international consultant. This is like WTF, like to me, it really speaks to the power of trusting the desires of our heart and taking the next aligned step.

So if you don't already have a clear vision for what you want your next year to be like, whether you are in early sobriety, whether you're not sober at all, whether you're an entrepreneur, whether you want to make money and travel the world, whatever it is. I felt like it would be so fun. Like my heart would be so excited if I could make money and travel the world.

And it really wasn't so much that I just wanted to make so much money. It was that I wanted to travel the world. And the only way I can do it is if I was making money while I was doing it. So it was like this big dream. And in 2009, I didn't know anybody who was doing that. It was, I think more rare than it is now.

It's a lot easier now to make money and travel the world, especially post pandemic people for remote working is, we got zoom. Yeah, so I flew to Australia. I was there five weeks. It was so much fun to be in Australia. Again, I was still super anxious. My brain wasn't working very well.

I had so many doubts and insecurities. It wasn't like I was ready. It wasn't like I was comfortable in my skin. It wasn't , like the sobriety part of it was easier. The anxiety part of it was easy. I was just kept doing the next thing. Kept trying to bring my feet back. Like my head to where my feet are.

And so there was all sorts of challenges while I was in Australia. Maybe I'll tell you those another time. Including I almost relapsed there. And so like it wasn't all easy or. But it wasn't all bad either. It's like we can take our mind and we can look at a time of our life and we could say it was bad, it was good, it was this or whatever, we could judge it.

But nothing is all bad and nothing is all good. It's like part of it is what you make it and part of it is like our mind is always changing, our feelings are always changing, you can't take one clip of the movie and say this little one scene of the movie just is the entire movie.

It was all of it. I had fun in Australia, this cool walk from like Bondi beach down to Coogee beach. It was so beautiful. Like this, like pathway. And and for me being in Australia as an American and never having done that before, it was so cool. Cause first of all, I love traveling the world.

And plus I was getting paid. I was making money to be there and my expenses were paid for. That was really cool. That was like my big dream that I didn't even think was possible,

Also, I'm getting to be in this other culture. Everything is new. I'm also having new adversity, right? Because I am now abroad. I don't know anybody there. I don't know the recovery community. I wasn't keeping myself accountable, my sobriety at first.

And so I went through all sorts of challenges and sometimes it's those hard times that really Give us what we need or show us who we are or test us so that we can actually apply the principles, the tried and true principles that work, right? And so one of the things I'll share with you now, cause I don't want to share too many tips with you in one podcast.

Cause I don't want to overwhelm you, but I met this guy in Australia. I think I was eight months sober. I turned nine months sober while I was there. Eight months sober. I'm at a recovery meeting there. And he had been sober for a long time.

I was outside of a meeting, I was having a lot of anxiety. I think I was having an anxiety attack when he approached me and I just I'm really uncomfortable. I'm really uncomfortable. And he's here's a tip. Rub your belly. I'm like, huh? I'm not freaking out, man.

What do you rub my belly? So I did. I just literally just rubbed my belly. Let's do it right now. Rub your belly. Are you rubbing your belly? Okay, I'm rubbing my belly. And as I was rubbing my belly, I closed my eyes. So go ahead and rub your belly and close your eyes, and bring your attention into the area where your hand meets your skin, your sweatshirt, whatever you're wearing, and just notice what happens when you rub your belly.

I notice that it's getting warm. I notice that my body is softening. What do you notice as you rub your belly? Let's take a deep inhale and exhale. Open your eyes if they were closed.

So basically what he was teaching me was another great way to work on anxiety, right? So when I rub my belly and I bring my attention into the area where my hand is touching my body, It gives me a chance to anchor into the present moment to out of my thoughts, out of my feelings and into the sensations that are arising by the physical act that I am doing, which is rubbing my belly.

And so that was not my go to strategy when I started out with anxiety, right? Because I had so much anxiety, I needed a mantra. I needed to repeat something because I had so many thoughts running through my head that I needed like to stop them by putting other thoughts in my head. But the rubbing a belly is a game changer.

I did it all the time. It was super helpful. Really the moral of all this story is, and he was a guide, right? He helped me with my anxiety while I was on this journey. There was a lot of other guides. There's a lot of other people I met in Australia. I'll tell you more about it another time. Really the point of this here today.

And this. This wanting to, whether you want to make money and travel the world or whether you have another dream on your heart and whether you're struggling, maybe you have a black eye, maybe you have a lot of anxiety. Maybe you're in rehab. If you have you feel like so behind in life because you're just getting sober or you have because of whatever's going on with your thought life or your emotional life, right?

It doesn't matter where you're starting from. It only matters where you're going. Get clear on where you want to go. Get clear on where you want to go and direct your life in that direction. I had no clue when I was in rehab with the black eye shaking, holding the lyrics to pink song coming off Benzo's and like literally violently shaking to the point where I was like, Whoa, this is scary.

Luckily I was in a medical center and there was doctors there that could help me. But I could not have imagined at that time that it would be a reality for me to start a new career as an international consultant. I had a dream. It was a delusional dream because it was nothing like my reality of the moment, right?

I was at the bottom of my bottom. I was like a breath away from death, scraped off the ground, in rehab, still not even sure how bad it is because I'm still in denial about the alcohol problem, right? But I had a dream. I wanted to be an international consultant. I wanted to make money and travel the world.

If I could find a way to travel and have that be my life, that would be so cool. So the invitation for you today is to find out what would be so fucking cool. What would be so effing cool if it could be your life? What would you just be so excited about if it was your life? What's your dream? What is your big dream?

Get super clear on your big dream. Write it down, claim it, put it on your mirror, put it on a post it, read it every day, get clear on where you want your life to go. It can be delusional. In fact, dream livers are delusional. We are delusional. When I had a dream being international consultant, it was a delusion.

It was so not like reality. Don't be like reality. Don't use your circumstances. To choose where you're going take action based upon your vision. That's the vibe. That is the vibe. And I wanna hear about it. Definitely let me know. Write it down, claim it, write it in the comments. Write it online, write it on your phone.

Write it anywhere. Write it everywhere. Write down what is your dream, what is this dream that you are claiming? And then we just start to move into that direction. I didn't take much action to become the international consultant. I did work my, I did work for the other company. And I did know these people, they were competitors.

They were like frenemies of the business. These are people that I did know who hired me to come over there. It's not so out of the blue, but also it is out of the blue because I had never worked for people like I had never been flown anywhere to work for somebody else before. So let the universe like, okay.

So this is more like my faith, right? Like my spiritual beliefs and stuff. We. And the power of the mind, which is undeniable. It's not a belief that our minds are incredibly powerful and what we focus on tends to come into like our world, right? Like we can't just change everything. There are rules to reality in a way, but also our minds are incredibly powerful and where our energy goes.

Like where we focus our energy goes, right? We're creating a lot of our life. We are creating with the thoughts we are choosing to think and the feelings we are allowing to be felt within our body. So whatever you're thinking, and then therefore your feeling is going to determine your actions.

If you don't believe something's possible, you might not take action in that direction. I'm asking you to become delusional with your dreams. , If you choose to accept this challenge and challenges are great, right? Let's get the fuck outside the comfort zone, right down an audacious delusional dream and start taking action in that direction.

Sobriety is like having a second shot at life. You might as well really go for it. You have nothing to lose. If it doesn't come true, you're still where you started. If it comes true holy crap. Isn't that cool? You know what I mean? The next year after Sydney, I ended up working another company, gave me a contract, hired me, flew me out to Copenhagen and I was out there at the Copenhagen office, which was cool,, and that's before I started my coaching business, which I started then after that and then moved overseas. But I always wanted to travel the world. Like as a lifestyle, and so that meant make money while traveling the world. And it's totally possible. It's easier now than it was in 2009 when I was in rehab writing that goal down.

It's a lot easier now. It's possible. It's totally possible. So many things are possible, but we have to start with that vision and then just take that next line step. Let your intuition guide you. Yeah. All right. All right. Courageous bestie. Thanks so much for listening today. Write down your dreams and.

Yeah, it's so fun to be able to shapeshift our reality by being conscious and deliberate. And you have that power. All right, bye.

 Thank  you so much for watching. If you like this video, give it a thumbs up, like it, subscribe for more and I'll see you in the next video. Have a beautiful day.

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Hi, I'm Bestie Kirsten

Founder of Sobriety Bestie and Creator of the courageous community Bestie Club, here to guide you on a  journey to freedom and self empowerment.

Do you want the secret to feeling comfy, confident and courageous in sober skin? Get the free mini course!

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