

For years, I used alcohol to quiet the fear. To shut down the anxiety. To ease the panic. To feel "normal."
Then one day, I caught my reflection in the mirror. I stopped. I didn’t recognize myself.
I looked like an empty shell—like the fire inside me was about to go out. And in that moment, I knew.
If I didn’t quit drinking, I was going to die.
I didn’t really choose to stop drinking.

For years, I used alcohol to quiet the fear. To shut down the anxiety. To ease the panic. To feel "normal."
Then one day, I caught my reflection in the mirror. I stopped. I didn’t recognize myself.
I looked like an empty shell—like the fire inside me was about to go out. And in that moment, I knew.
If I didn’t quit drinking, I was going to die.
I didn’t really choose to stop drinking.
Getting sober didn’t make my fears disappear. They were always there.
🚫 Freeway phobia.
🚫 Avoiding leaving the house.
🚫 Public speaking? Hell no.
I couldn’t even sit with my own emotions. The anxiety attacks felt nonstop. Before, I numbed it all with alcohol. But now?

Getting sober didn’t make my fears disappear. They were always there.
🚫 Freeway phobia.
🚫 Avoiding leaving the house.
🚫 Public speaking? Hell no.
I couldn’t even sit with my own emotions. The anxiety attacks felt nonstop. Before, I numbed it all with alcohol. But now?

I went from being afraid to leave my house… to moving to Bali and traveling the world.
From avoiding driving for 3.5 years… to solo road-tripping 13,000 miles across the U.S.
From terrified of public speaking… to sharing all my deep dark secrets in a TEDx talk.
From a crippling fear of dogs… to falling in love with my Bali dog bestie, Luna.
From being petrified to leave AA... to breaking free from the "forever recovery" dogma in 2020.
From being terrified to say I left AA… to publishing 120+ deprogramming podcasts to help others get free.
I went from being afraid to leave my house… to moving to Bali and traveling the world.
From avoiding driving for 3.5 years… to solo road-tripping 13,000 miles across the U.S.
From terrified of public speaking… to sharing all my deep dark secrets in a TEDx talk.
From a crippling fear of dogs… to falling in love with the Bali dog, Luna.
From being petrified to leave AA... to breaking free from the "forever recovery" dogma in 2020.
From being afraid to say I left AA… to publishing 120+ deprogramming podcasts that are helping thousands break free.

You’re a soul inside a body built to evolve, to create, to come alive again.
You can rewire your brain, rewrite your story, and live like you f*cking mean it.
Around here, we ditch the dogma — no one-size-fits-all, no waiting for permission.
Just truth, traction, and the kind of support I wish I’d had when I wanted to make moves.




You’re a soul inside a body built to evolve, to create, to come alive again.
You can rewire your brain, rewrite your story, and live like you f*cking mean it.
Around here, we ditch the dogma — no one-size-fits-all, no waiting for permission.
Just truth, traction, and the kind of support I wish I’d had when I wanted to make moves.

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